Forums > Queen - General Discussion > Thoughts on Thor Arnold and Lee Nolan's eleven year friendship with Freddie

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FreddieDarling user not visiting Queenzone.com
FreddieDarling
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Posted: 01 Apr 19, 22:28 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Hi folks

Life's been hectic and I've been behind on keeping up reading the thread.

I've now rectified this ! Just wanted to clarify something.

One poster reported about a Jim Hating Troll who may try and poke their beaks into out our nice thread.

What worried me was that their username was reported to be FreddieDearie. When I read it, I though oh cripes, that's too similar to MY username for comfort. :-(

Just want to say that this troll is not me! I have utmost respect for Jim Hutton and everyone around Freddie who was good and kind to him.

Thor: Thank you I am very relieved that your and Lee's book WILL go ahead!
Bye for now, folks.



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Posted: 01 Apr 19, 23:15 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

NeverTooLate wrote:

One of the rumors they were keen to dispel was the notion that Freddie did not have a companion in his life and they pointedly mentioned that Freddie did have someone special, a very stable and loving relationship. That was when they mentioned a group of 3 who were with Freddie constantly in the months and weeks as his disease progressed. There were more than 3, but Phoebe, Joe, and Jim were the ones who did the lion's share of the work and were each taking shifts so Freddie would never be alone in the last week or so.


Thanks NeverTooLate. The three men did do the lion's share of the caretaking, but they were not the only ones there.

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Posted: 01 Apr 19, 23:21 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Freddie seemed to be more comfortable with men in general and as part of his inner circle in the house and working for him. Aside from Mary, Barbara Valentin in Munich, and a couple women he worked with on costumes, he didn't appear to have many close female friendships.

thundergod user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 01 Apr 19, 23:38 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

They talk admirably of a certain "un-named" group of three

men who cared for Freddie to the end, but the absence of

ONE PARTICULAR female in this scene was to me, glaringly

conspicuous. I don't want to go there, but these were Brian's

and Roger's own words or should I say, absence of words..

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Posted: 01 Apr 19, 23:39 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I hope this revision clears up the confusion regarding what I meant with this.

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Posted: 01 Apr 19, 23:40 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

NeverTooLate,

I’ve thought the exact same thing. I would’ve immensely loved hanging out and laughing with Freddie, but he mostly seemed to prefer male company.

My daughter, on the other hand, has more gay male friends than straight male friends or even female friends. I’m thankful that her generation is so much more accepting of everyone, no matter their sexual preference, race, ethnicity, religion, etc.

CHEVYMAN user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 00:08 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Freddie darling we know that hateful person could never be you but I get what your say it is similar to your name.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 00:31 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Emerald I guess I always new I was a little different I like to be in the company of men I dont get along with women at all except for physical purpose and that's it I much more in common with men and I also like men from and emotional physical aspect as well and I also am attracted to a gay Male so see I'm one of a kind I never really had a sexual preference and I dont believe in labeling people I think you should be free to love who you want I'm married to a man but all through high school I dated many boys and girls but then married my husband he accepts me as I am .I'm one in a million.

Rainbow61 user is on Queenzone.com

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 00:36 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Freddie was blessed with a core group of 4 people who were unwavering in their dedication to him during his toughest days…the truest of friends. Whether they tended to Freddie in a nursing capacity or were just there as a constant reassuring presence so that he knew he was not alone, their steadfast devotion reflected the love they each had for him. I take comfort in knowing that Phoebe, Joe, Jim, and Mary, each in their own way, showed Freddie that he was not in this by himself.

There were others, Elton, Dave Clark, Brian and Roger etc. who also loved and supported Freddie. In addition, I'm sure Thor and Lee's visit that last summer brought much joy and laughter into Garden Lodge...and we all know how much Freddie loved to laugh. I prefer to see all these people through Freddie’s eyes. If asked to describe them, he probably would have simply said, “Those are my friends”…and that meant everything to him. I don’t think he ranked their importance based on how often he saw them, but how they made him feel. So to all of those who played an important role during Freddie's declining months and days, thank you for being there!

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 00:51 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Thank you for that post Rainbow. That is exactly how I feel.

I'm going to get personal for just a second. Several years ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Immediately a core group formed around me and supported me through the treatment. Some drove me for chemo or other appointments, some came and talked, some sent weekly cards, and my beloved neighbor went grocery shopping twice a week for me. For a long time I lived on a diet of bananas, rice, applesauce and toast, and the medical people here will know why. Well, he learned quickly that I only eat bananas that are just this side of green, and he never let me down. I wrote a weekly blog for these people and I called them my Angel Team. I wouldn't want to go through that again, but I there were several blessings in the experience. Most important for me was knowing I was not alone and I was loved.

I think Freddie had his Angel Team. They made sure he wasn't alone, they respected the medical choices he made, and they loved him.

None of us can ask for more.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 01:21 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Well this has been a busy thread so much discussion the most I have seen since I have been here that's a good thing.I would like to change subject for a minute and congradulate phoebe on all his hard work he is doing on the TFA Project you are awesome peter keep up the hard work you are making a difference.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 01:22 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

I just hope this group of four remained appreciative of each other and each other's roles at this terrible time.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 01:25 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

God Bless Peter Freestone!

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 01:27 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

This is the most activity I have seen on this thread that's a good thing.I would like to change the subject for a minute and congradulate phoebe on the TFA Project and say job well done keep up the hard work.You are making a difference.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 01:38 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Thor you know how it is when someone is sick in a family there is always one that shows their ass I hope noone did and if they did I'm sure he was already gone the ones who cared for him have their memories and no regrets because they did everything they possibly could it was out of their hands.I read one of the poor guys was pretty sick himself but he was still taking care of his friend so heart wrenching.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 02:13 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Inevertoolate that reply was for you not emerald I'm sorry so many people talking on here I got mixed up.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 02:21 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Hey, have any of you ever seen the musical We Will Rock You? I just saw that they are taking it on a North American tour, and it will hit my city in November. I'd love to see it, but wow, the tickets are more than they would be for a show in the Broadway series. I was hoping it would come as part of the series, but it's a stand alone show, and it's actually in a smaller, older theater. Tempting, but I probably can't convince anyone to go.

Rainbow61 user is on Queenzone.com

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 02:39 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Katydyd5,

Congratulations on being a cancer survivor and thank you for sharing your story!

I did not realize that WWRY was touring North America. I can't seem to find the US tour dates except for one in California and one in NY.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 03:21 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Rainbow, I debated sharing that story and only did so because I was trying to show that serious illness often leads a person to close ranks and draw in the people who are truly important to them. But thanks for the congrats. It's in my rearview mirror now for sure.

I saw a post on FB today where Brian was talking about WWRY, and Cincinnati was mentioned. If you Google WWRY North American Tour you can see the dates. It's a pretty extensive tour.

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Posted: 02 Apr 19, 07:24 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Katydyd5 congratulations from me too.

This is my reply in response to Thor's observations and please don't judge me a\s I mean no offence.

Thor I don't know if you have seen it but in the days following Freddies death, one particular journo wrote a vile piece for the sun/mirror newspaper about Freddie. I won't go into details but you can find it on the internet. It was awful. Anyway I feel it was in response to this that Brian and Roger went on UK Breakfast TV. You will notice at the end that the woman interviewing them said that Freddie didn't find the love he was looking for and he died alone. It was that perception that I belive was one of the reasons Jim wrote his book. I was pleased to see Brain say that he had been cared for by three men and that he was in a loving and stable relationship.

Did you know that the day after Freddie passed, MA AND Dave Clark gave story to the trashy newspaper about how they had cared for him and how awful it had been for Freddie but neither of them mentioned the three men. I belive this was a PR stunt organised by JB of thee Queen machine. I belive the same person arranged for press photographers to take photos at the funeral. Freddies friend Dave Evans confirms as much in his book as he conveyed his thoughts on the matter. He said he had not been asked questions about a funeral before whilst in tears . speaks volumes.

In Jim Hutton's book he says he took him a while to realise he had been pushed out , the same happened to Joe and Phoebe. I think a lot went on at the time to try and preserve some kind of wholesome image of Freddie and to keep his sexuality a secret . I feel Jim's book blew this out of the water as have several books since.

Why it was decided to feature someone so heavily in the film we will never know. it's clear Freddie adored this person and had a lot of trust BUT there are a lot of fans that are upset by certain behaviours . I hope you understand this? This person wouldn't have been so lucky to be in the current position without the fans who adored queen and freddie and helped them on their road to stardom. I feel Freddie really appreciated his fans and he knew the fans had been a big part of what he had been able to acheive.

The film has split fans and now there are two camps; one for Jim and one for MA. Luckily there is a lot of love for Jim Hutton . Some fans of MA appear to want to erase Jim and some have said they think he just wanted man for sex but all other aspects, love/emotions etc he needed Mary.

anyway sorry for the long post. Must go to work now lol