Forums > Queen - General Discussion > Thoughts on Thor Arnold and Lee Nolan's eleven year friendship with Freddie

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SmokyQuartz user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 18 Dec 17, 21:56 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Sponge Caves, something you mentioned about Freddie calling fans 'ugly,' I read that too but I believe it was in the early days, they were young and starting out and it was a private joke, amongst friends. The joke being that you can't have ugly people at a Queen concert.

I agree with you and others here that Freddie should not be sanitised. At the same time I think some fans hang on to his 'bad' stuff because they think it makes their bad behaviour ok, and they take what he did out of context (I'm not saying you did). A lot of the examples given by people took place privately, with close friends who wouldn't take offence, etc. Also they were years apart, but when written in one paragraph make it look like he was doing that all the time.

No one would want Freddie to be a saint, but I get the impression he was essentially a good person with morals. Far too many people have said that he was kind, warm hearted and generous. At the same time he took no shit from people and by all accounts you had to work hard to gain his acceptance. Good for him.

He said in one interview that he lets his characters loose at the right times, I think there were many facets and he did let them loose when he felt it was appropriate.

Someone mentioned he punched a photographer?? I've never heard that one....what happened? Why? (edited, LOTV, it was you and yes I agree re his imperfections, it allows others to have them too)

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Posted: 18 Dec 17, 21:58 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

noorie wrote:

SmokyQuartz, please let your cursor hover next to the date of the post you want to reply to. There is 'edit post', 'reply to post' and 'reply with quote' - all invisible until you hover over them! :) Click on the 'reply with quote'.



LOL, got it, they disappeared, thanks Noorie! :-)

thundergod user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 18 Dec 17, 22:09 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Hi Invisible Woman,
Sorry we did not get back to you on your question yet. So far we are not 100% decided on doing a book. Doing a documentary is not even
on our "things to do list". We'll let you know if a book is in the making after Christmas or in the new year. Thanks for being patient..

Dustin Zimmerman user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 00:15 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Lol yeah Lee you were probably taken aback by the Barbara story because it's ridiculous. Lets see.. In every interview he ever took his entire career when asked about who he was dating he only talked about Mary even when Barbara claims they were together. Peter said it never happened (multiple times he's had to say it). If he was bisexual why didn't he ever get back with Mary who he loved enough to leave so much to? If he was bisexual then why didn't anyone in his circle EVER see him show interest in women at all after Mary? There were plenty of men on record but peter said in all the years he knew Freddie, freddie never had sex with a woman or even showed interest in one sexually. Surely a bisexual with access to loads of women and cash could have and would have been seen showing interest in women at some point. He didn't. Gee wonder what could mean. Barbara herself said Freddie didn't tell her he had AIDS after he found out and even cut himself by accident near her and screamed for her to get away from him and not touch the blood. Yet he told Jim Hutton, and Joe Fanelli (who he had stopped having sex with some 7 years before that) to get tested. If he had any sexual relationship with Barbara why did he not tell her to get tested too? Why did he hide it from her when he told his ex lovers? Why did she have to find out about it over a year after he was diagnosed instead of him telling her? Why didn't he leave her anything in the estate? Why did he literally tell two separate people on two separate occasions that he never had sex with her? Why was she on the untold story (audio and video) NEVER claiming to have been his lover? On a documentary that just so happened to be fact checked. Lee, I don't blame you guys for thinking it was odd. It was odd because it never happened. It's also worded a certain way in the Freddie's Loves doc. Peter says he slept with men and women because before Mary, there were women. Peter also says he knows they shared a bed but had they ever had sex, freddie would have said something to him about it. Barbaras own best friend was on there saying literally "had Freddie not been a HOMOSEXUAL perhaps they could have been married". She was a beard in the 80s (not one he even took seriously because he never even mentioned her in interviews and just held her hand for for the press in photos). A beard who waited until he died to make bullshit claims and that's why it was so weird for you to hear it, Lee. Keep in mind that peter talks about the fact that Freddie used her as a beard for a while (like mary was at the time) but Barbara turned around and started telling the German press that they were getting married. Freddie started to realize that every time they left a restaurant or theater in Germany, there were suddenly press and media waiting for them so she had to grab his hand or kiss him for photos. He talked about how COINCIDENTLY all the press that showed up to take their photos and spread the marriage lie just so happened to be friends with Barbara herself. Freddie started to question how they always seemed to know where they would be- ready to take their photo. Freddie cut her out of his life for a few years for a reason. She tried using him while he was alive and he didn't care for it. So she waited until he was dead and a tabloid writer who wouldn't fact check came around to use his name again. This time he wasn't here to defend himself. She even tossed in some physical abuse and attempted murder for good measure.

And invisible women it's important to know Freddie was gay and not bisexual because lgbt people (especially in that time) struggled with having to hide their sexual identity for fear of losing their careers. The man had to keep it on the DL for years. To ignore it or claim it isn't important (his story and his struggle) isn't important....Is disrespectful. It's part of who he was. That's why it's important.


If you don't want to hear a Barbara rant again just skip over it. The can of worms was already opened. Lee mentioned his shock over the story when he heard it and I'm telling him why it was shocking.

thundergod user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 01:11 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Well Dustin,
The fact that Lee and I knew nothing about this woman and when we were in London, still did not hear of her, says something.
Freddie never once since I've known him, ever pointed out a woman as his desire.
I dated about five girls in High School in order to fit in with the crowd and cause no attention to myself. In the early '70s, you could
not admit you were gay and especially if you could "pass" as straight. No name-calling, no shoves into the lockers and no bullying
was just fine with me. So, the "beard" philosophy is definitely true. Also, a good amount of gays even went as far as marring and
having children to ensure they could still become doctors and lawyers and professors. If you did not live as a gay man (or woman)
in the 1970's you would just have NO idea of how it actually was then.


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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 01:45 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Thanks Thor. Well said. It's a damn shame that so many people had to deal with that kind of bullying and abuse for being gay.

Katydyd5 user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 02:14 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote



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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 02:47 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

OK Katydyd,
I hope people can understand this so I'll try not to go too far. When I was 6 years old I wound up in the playground behind a big tree
and I put my hand down a very cute kids pants. He was wearing his cub-scout uniform and I thought he was dreamy. From age 9 to
14, the little old lady who lived nextdoor started to rent out her upstairs rooms to college students. I would turn out all my lights, pull
up a chair and spent hours trying to catch this guy either coming out of the shower, having sex with a girl, or masturbating. Even if I
stayed awake until 4AM with school the next day, it was WORTH it. I got such a secret thrill out of this. I guess my point is that I always
knew I liked men but I had no idea what that made me. Finally I saw a David Susskind (popular in the late 60's) interview with a
"homosexual." I was relieved that I had a new understanding of who or what But my preferences at such an early age had no name for it.
I went the next day to the Hofstra University Library and spent the whole day looking up books on homosexual behavior well that was sort
of a relief for me but I also became very disturbed.that I was something that people hated and despised. I was miserable until age 17
when I left home on Graduation Day and met and fell in love with a very special person. That was great and I was finally content with
myself and happy.

thundergod user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 02:49 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Katydyd, What happened to your question, I read it here, answered, and now the message is gone.

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 02:54 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Correction:

"homosexual." I was relieved that I had a new understanding of who or what I was, but my preferences at such an early age had no name for it.

Villiers user not visiting Queenzone.com
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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 02:56 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Thor that happens sometimes when you're trying to edit a comment. But I saw what she asked. She asked Thor how young he was when he realized he was gay or how he knew. Thor, you and I have a similar story there. And apparently Freddie had his first experience with a boy at 14 at St.Peters. I assume his story was much like ours.

thundergod user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 02:58 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Always a pleasure to hear from you Villiers, Thank you much.

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 03:04 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

thundergod wrote:

Katydyd, What happened to your question, I read it here, answered, and now the message is gone.


I am so sorry. I decided it was way too personal, so I wanted to delete it, but it still left my name hanging there. I was kinda hoping it would look like a mistake. Thanks for answering though. I think you have a wonderful opportunity here to tell Freddie stories, and to educate at the same time.

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 03:19 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

LOL Villiers, you were too quick for me!

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 03:25 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Thor.....you're very brave for putting your story out there!! But it sounds very Real!! Thank you for sharing such an intimate story. The atrocities that humans have put other humans through....whether it's in the name of religion, race, or sexual identity is a pox on our entire species!! Why humans can't just 'live n let live"???....i'll never understand. I've quite often stated that Humans are bad animals!! My dogs have taught me more about forgiveness, unconditional love, stoicism, living in the moment, and of course loyalty and undying affection!!! I haven't met too many humans w/as many good traits as these!! But Hopefully, as we evolve and grow......i do Think that a large majority of us humans are learning and practicing peace, tolerance, embracing differences, and loving ALL People!!!

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 03:42 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

HaHa Blenkolove,
Both my sister and myself as well as Brandon are animal lovers. She and he volunteer in Animal Shelters in their prospective states.
My sister once drove from New York to Mississippi just to deliver a dog to a new owner at her own expense. We always comment on
how most animals have much better personalities and love for all, than most of people.

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 04:10 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote



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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 04:12 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Oh no...I'm right there with you Katydyd...but I didn't try to edit, or erase...LOL

Tonya user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 04:25 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Rainbow61 - I have been one of the silent followers of these two threads.

I have thoroughly enjoyed reading all these stories and everyone’s input (well, except for a couple ??). As I closed the thread one night last week, I hit the reply button unknowingly. Imagine my surprise when I checked it again later and Thor had responded! Lol

Thor and Lee (I am aware that I am posting this time! Ha) -

I know you said you sat in the friends and family section with Brian’s mother and father at one concert. Did you ever see Freddie’s parents or any of the other band members’ families?



thundergod user not visiting Queenzone.com

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Posted: 19 Dec 17, 04:42 Edit this post Reply to this post Reply with Quote

Welcome Tonya,
I have never met Freddie's Mom and Dad or his sister. I don't think we ever introduced to John Deacon's family nor Rodgers.
Of course they may have been back stage but I just did not recognize them. Freddie was not all that interested in mingling
with the band when his friends were around. I wish now that I had been introduced to all of them.